When I press the tip of my nose to the glass and breathe, I form a heart <3
At the risk of letting out my emotions and having them backfire just as soon, I'm writing about them now to remind me that I do not have a calloused heart like I had begun to think.
There are couples who profess their feelings online and to my friends who might get offended, I'm sorry but I never thought you could make me cringe so much. I get that sometimes your feelings can just flow from your hypothalamus to the keyboard, but just one post is already enough. It's not cynicism that makes me regurgitate; it's the fact that I was once (twice, or even more than thrice) like that. And if someone will ask me what I regret doing, it's putting my mush for everyone to see. . I just feel a little sad that I am more disgusted instead of proud or, at least, okay that I am a verbally affectionate person. Some level of mushiness, though, can really be inspiring and if you're a pessimist you might get jealous. It doesn't help at all that this other entry is made by a superlatively cute guy who is not afraid to spread his mush on the World Wide Web.
I once told V who was always eager to have her first boyfriend that when she does find somebody, she will wish otherwise. But now, I don't think it's such a dreadful idea and neither is being single. Truth be told, I have always been a cynic and even more so when I was burned. I would like to give myself an award, I have to say, and maybe allow a five-minute speech for being more mature this time. I admit I am not ready to be in a relationship not because I'm afraid, but I have bigger priorities and I have some things to work with for myself. I'm not in a hurry, I no longer get unreasonably jealous or envious, I do care about my ex(es) and I don't mind not being their closest friends or even friends at all. Exes as friends are not necessary, as are stuffed toys, the constant texting and IM-ing and phone conversations. I had come from a deep shit of neediness and back, which puts me outside the box to realize what part of myself and my relationships need fixing. So do not worry, future boyfriend, whoever you may be because I will not post on your Facebook Wall five times each day, baby-talk you, or ask you suspiciously what you have been up to. But please write that down in case I forget.
Now I am reveling in the company of friends and that kind of freedom where you don't care if you look and act foolish because there's someone you want to impress. If there's anyone I need to, that's me... and my boss. Once a month though (which inexplicably coincides with my period), I get all emo and wish I had a line to post on Facebook, one which only I and my partner can understand. And that fuzzy feeling spelled as "kilig" when you look into their eyes and you see a smile coming - that, I miss.
There are couples who profess their feelings online and to my friends who might get offended, I'm sorry but I never thought you could make me cringe so much. I get that sometimes your feelings can just flow from your hypothalamus to the keyboard, but just one post is already enough. It's not cynicism that makes me regurgitate; it's the fact that I was once (twice, or even more than thrice) like that. And if someone will ask me what I regret doing, it's putting my mush for everyone to see. . I just feel a little sad that I am more disgusted instead of proud or, at least, okay that I am a verbally affectionate person. Some level of mushiness, though, can really be inspiring and if you're a pessimist you might get jealous. It doesn't help at all that this other entry is made by a superlatively cute guy who is not afraid to spread his mush on the World Wide Web.
I once told V who was always eager to have her first boyfriend that when she does find somebody, she will wish otherwise. But now, I don't think it's such a dreadful idea and neither is being single. Truth be told, I have always been a cynic and even more so when I was burned. I would like to give myself an award, I have to say, and maybe allow a five-minute speech for being more mature this time. I admit I am not ready to be in a relationship not because I'm afraid, but I have bigger priorities and I have some things to work with for myself. I'm not in a hurry, I no longer get unreasonably jealous or envious, I do care about my ex(es) and I don't mind not being their closest friends or even friends at all. Exes as friends are not necessary, as are stuffed toys, the constant texting and IM-ing and phone conversations. I had come from a deep shit of neediness and back, which puts me outside the box to realize what part of myself and my relationships need fixing. So do not worry, future boyfriend, whoever you may be because I will not post on your Facebook Wall five times each day, baby-talk you, or ask you suspiciously what you have been up to. But please write that down in case I forget.
Now I am reveling in the company of friends and that kind of freedom where you don't care if you look and act foolish because there's someone you want to impress. If there's anyone I need to, that's me... and my boss. Once a month though (which inexplicably coincides with my period), I get all emo and wish I had a line to post on Facebook, one which only I and my partner can understand. And that fuzzy feeling spelled as "kilig" when you look into their eyes and you see a smile coming - that, I miss.
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